It’s summer, the sun is shining, it’s that kind of perfect weather… And I’m inside, studying to retake an exam. But I don’t really mind, as I don’t have the money to do all the fun stuff anyways. My life is so tragic.
Either way, here’s a sort of closer look, analysing of my current condition: studying.
Clothes: yoga pants and loose T-shirt with owl print.
However important elegance is to me, it doesn’t apply to all situations, okay? It’s bloody hot in my room, and I need the freedom to change my position every five to ten seconds. Plus: my inner dancer is very happy with these yoga pants. I can get up and throw my leg in the air whenever I want. Which is something I frequently do. (It sounds as if I’ve got a prosthesis. I mean to say I do a grand battement.)
The owl print is really cool, by the way. It’s more of a drawing made of stripes. Maybe I make it sound worse with every word I add, but seriously, it’s one of my favourite T-shirts. And it’s loose. Literally cool.
Makeup & Hair: Not really, and a mess.
Self conscious as I am, I do put on makeup when I leave the house, even if it’s just to buy bread or something. It makes passing by a mirror somewhat easier to deal with as well. But I got to the point where I sincerely long to dressing up and going all the way with makeup… Not just mascara, but eyeshadow, eyeliner, lipstick, everything I can find here (which isn’t that much after all). The only makeup thing I have done now, is nail polish. I don’t think I’ve ever had such well done toe and finger nail polish. Seriously.
The hair, well, that’s more of a bun, if you want to call it like that. In reality it’s more like hair surrounded by a rubber band (the ones you use for hair, not like car tires).
Physical condition: hypochondriac.
Insomnia has been kicking in, I’m hungry all the time, headaches, chest ache for the moment, and so on. I’m always convinced I’ve got some terrible illness, but that’s probably not true. I mean, everyone has aches every now and then. I just wish I could sleep well. That would be so great.
Mental condition: happy as ever.
Hehe. I’m not really the shiny happy person who’s always optimistic. Things have been better, things have been worse. My self-esteem has decided to go on a holiday, but hey, he deserves it. He’s had a hard time after all. I hope he sends a post card.
Concentration: what’s that? Some kind of illness? It’s certainly not something I’ve got.
Desk condition: pretty crowded!
I’ve got like four piles of papers in the running, a book, Word documents, books I use to procrastinate, pens, pencils, movies I still have to watch, a Spanish fan (the ones you have in your hand. the automatic one has a place on the floor) and a stuffed pig. I’m not sure what to do with that pig. He’s kinda cute, and I got it once at a dance performance. Good memories. I’ll just let him be another witness of my struggle.
Knowledge condition: however much I’m trying to get all facts straight and in my head, I’m sure he’ll ask something I don’t know. Plus: it’s history I have to retake. Only the Polish, but all history is so tied together. Hurray hurray. I wish I had the feeling I know stuff, but I still feel like I don’t know anything at all. Like ‘Poland? It’s a country, right? Somewhere, I don’t know, south from America?’.
Only five more days to go.
Five’s not much.