On the Dark Side

What if you let your dark side take over?

An unfortunate event has allowed the Devil to own your soul. He has decided to give you a chance to get it back but to win it you must bring a smile to the Devil’s face with your actions. He allows you to have one full day in which you can do anything your heart desires without fear of consequences, retaliation, retribution or prosecution.

What does your darker half have in store for the rest of us? What can you do to make the Devil smile but still keep your humanity?

Challenge from Okay what if. Thanks to the Indecisive Eejit for writing a post about this and spreading the idea like that!


First things first, I’d take my pencil skirt, fish net stockings, high heels and my hat – if you are about to do evil, better look classy. Hats are perfect for this because you can look at people from underneath the border. I’d put  on red lipstick and black leather gloves.
Then I’d leave the house. In my left hand a cigarette, in my right a Kalashnikov (or any other gunlike weapon). There I’d go, on high heels, my eyes covered by the shadow of the hat.

Having the support of the Devil also means you are able to track your targets I suppose. Otherwise I would find them anyways. I know who I want to find. There are many ways to hunt them down. So first I go to that one specific enterprise.
“I want to see the boss”, I say.
“Do you have an appointment?”, the slightly confused secretary asks. I grin.
“I don’t need an appointment, believe me.”
“Are you sure?”
I slowly lift the kalash.
“Dear, stop asking questions. I know very well what I’m doing. Make yourself a coffee and everything will be okay.”
She blinks quickly when watching the kalash, and remains silent. I pass by with her big eyes following me. With a little push from the kalash her computer screen falls over and is shattered.

But there is no way I will let anyone distract me. So I walk on until I end up at his office. He’s just sitting back calling with someone – and it’s certainly not business stuff. As soon as he sees me he gives me an angry look. I just enter the office and take over his phone.
“What the-”
“Shhhh.” I hold my finger in front of my lips, and then drop the phone. With a slow but strong movement I shatter it underneath my heel.
“You, sir, are one of the biggest assholes I have ever known. You don’t even have a shadow of a conscience. Money and power are the only things on your mind.”
“Who are you?” he says, with a red face.
“Why would you mind? Listen to me, shithead. Listen!”
I push him back in his chair.
“I will give you a part of what you deserve. Burn in hell.”

Then I point my gun and shoot him in the knees.

I nod and then slowly walk away again. To the next target. There are still many knees to shatter, or arms to give a grazing shot, so many people to scare.
There’s the asshole that made me feel useless and extremely bad – here comes the bullet.
There’s the bitch that said all those things to people close to me – do you see this gun? It’s pointed at you and I could shoot. But I don’t. She will always remember though. No more insults. No more, no more, no more.

O, and look who’s there. I smile and he comes over at me.
“Well hello there.”
“Hello”, I say.
“Everything okay?”
Something makes this sound very insincere. I’ve got the feeling he doesn’t really know what to say, or how I’ll respond. But I still smile. Then I show my kalash.
“I’m fine, perfectly fine. And how are you these days?”
“Eh… Okay as well I guess…”
He sees the gun and thinks ‘shit, she’s such a freak’.
“No need to be afraid. A good aim and no one will know or feel it.”
At that point he starts to look scared. Little drops of sweat drip down his face. His hands shake.
“Is that supposed to be comforting or something?”
I laugh.
“It’s funny how scared you are”, I say. “It’s funny how you seem to believe you’re worth a bullet.”

Then I nod at him again and walk away, lighting another cigarette. It’s getting darker, smoke surrounds me, and slightly smiling I leave the stage I constructed for the day. Tomorrow I’ll be gunless again, but this day has finally brought me the revenge I have been longing for for so long.
Sweet, sweet revenge.

Dear Devil, does this please you as much as it pleases me?

Leave a comment


  1. I’d go with different versions of what you say to the last guy. Though the knee-capping is pretty clever too.
    Hope for your sake the devil never makes that offer. Not their sakes. Just yours.

    Hmm…and now I have an idea…

    • What different version then? Shooting him anyways? 😉
      Thanks for being worried about my sake, hehe :). Maybe it’s already lost for just thinking these things… *shriek*

  2. Mummy? The Belgian girl on the Internet is scaring me again!

    If I was in that position, I would do something like this. Setup an HDTV so people think it’s a window…

  3. Stealing something from Pink Floyd but…
    I personally don’t have a dark side – as a matter of fact it’s ALL dark! xx

  4. Addie

     /  September 18, 2013

    Red lipstick always makes everything a tad bit more wicked.

    • It does, doesn’t it? That’s why I just had to add it – though when I was younger I’d look like a hooker with red lipstick… So I never wore it :).

  5. Ooo great post! Just remind me never to piss you off, the thought of the dark eyes hidden under a hat and the fishnet tights had me quaking ffs! lol

    • I think it’s funny how little people are in fact scared of the kalsh, but okay :).
      Thanks to you I wrote this post, so you’ll have to do your best before I actually get mad at you!

  6. Part of my original challenge states “to remember this is only for one day. I don’t want to be responsible for permanently releasing demons on the world”

    After reading this I think I may have failed and a demon has been released. You seen to enjoy your revenge too much to give it up. Thanks for linking to the What if challenge. I thought the post was great

    • Thanks for the idea! Without you I wouldn’t have let the demons out, and yes, I enjoyed it :).
      But now I’ll return to my small little innocent world and everything will be fine again. Except for some shattered knees then… 😉

  7. runningonsober

     /  September 20, 2013

    Oooh la la! Loved it!

    Fish nets, hat and that red lipstick—why wait for an invitation from the devil? Sounds like a great outfit for any occasion!

    Loved the dialogue too. Excellent work, my dear.

    • Thank you Christy!
      Actually I wore that once because we had an organised dressing up week. I liked wearing that so much! It was my source of inspiration for this :).

  1. The Devil made me do it! | The Indecisive Eejit
  2. Update on the What if challenge? Week 3 | Okay, what if ?

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