When maturity kicks in…

It struck me a while ago. I was in a book shop, where you can buy textbooks and pens and that kind of stuff. The people who work there are always in a bad mood. It’s always crowded and the queue’s are long.

So I was there.
And I bought an agenda.

I did this before, but it was never much like this. And it only got worse – I used it. I actually used it.

So now it’s impossible to close my eyes to what’s happening. People – I’m getting mature!

But honestly, it was about time. With all the work I have now, it’s almost impossible to do what I did last year. My first year of university was quite relaxed. I did what was necessary, got good grades, but I also went out a lot, in the last months often two times a week, and when I went out, I drank too much. I never really did something stupid, but I wouldn’t be well awake the following day, and I wouldn’t do anything productive either. When I had class at 11 am or even 2 pm I didn’t do anything (except for washing my hair). I can’t even remember how I did that. How could I be so… stupid? Yes, stupid. I got good grades in the end, but I hated every and each morning after a night of drinking. My limits weren’t limited enough. How could I not see that going out late is even more fun if you aren’t exhausted the next day? (Drinking less makes the morning after so much nicer!)
It was a year full of going out and confusion situations. One very bitter experience in the beginning of this school year has made me think though. It was enough. It was too much. I was sick of this weird things happening when having drunk, I was sick of being tired, I was sick of people in general.

Because sometimes, maturity can’t express what we really want.

So then things really started to change.

Not only did I buy an agenda, I never drunk that much anymore, I started studying, I woke up earlier so I could do school stuff before class. I’m becoming boring, but responsible. There’s no more drama. There’s no more annoying, tired, headache-y morning afters. Instead I go home in time and accept the fact that those wild nights are no longer possible. I’m just so overwhelmed by all the work I have. It’s only been the fourth week of our school year and I’m already panicking.

Becoming mature isn’t fun.

It has to be said. It’s better, it’s healthier, I guess it pleases the people around me, but it’s boring. My life is changing into ‘school and school only’ and I don’t like that. There are no more stories to tell because I don’t go out late with a lot of beer anymore. There are less bizarre events (though still too much – in an unpleasant way) to laugh with. Life is studies. Yes, I like to be well awake and the lack of the aftermath of beer. That’s great.

But now I want exciting things to happen again, in between studying and eating and sleeping… There might just be a minute left for the non-mature part to show up again!

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